10 Ways To Fight Subdrop
Post Scene Depression Can Be Controlled
by Sir Real
Subdrop is a state of depression and moodiness that often occurs after a heavy scene or where the submissive is away from their dominant for an extended period of time. Subdrop can happen quickly or it may not manifest itself for several days after the scene. It may also appear as the result of being away from a relationship where feelings of love and submission are particularly strong.
Longing for a lover that you miss is familiar to everyone, even within the vanilla world, but in the world of BDSM, it can be much worse. This is because prolactin and cortisol levels may become
quite elevated as a result of endorphin, oxytocin, and dopamine releases that often occur within the context of BDSM practices and relationships
(see The Science Behind BDSM). For women, if subdrop occurs just prior to their menstrual cycle, PMS can turn
subdrop into a double whammy.
When it's possible to be with your dominant, the effects of subdrop can be somewhat counteracted with lots of cuddling, touching, and nurturing to promote continued oxytocin release.
Aftercare isn't something done only immediately after a BDSM scene, it
should be something the dominant should do in follow up with the submissive
for days afterward. This should especially include phone calls to
check on the submissive when personal contact can't be made.
In addition, there are many ways to minimize the effects of subdrop within yourself, especially when you know it's coming and can learn to anticipate and plan for it.
Here are 10 things you can do to help fight subdrop:
1. Foods Can Affect Your Moods
If you don't eat right properly, you may find that low blood sugar can contribute to your moodiness and subdrop. There may be a tendency to go for "comfort foods" that usually are made up of simple carbohydrates. These foods include sugary foods like candy, cookies, sugar cereals,
pastries, etc. They also include starchy foods like white bread, pasta,
potatoes, and white rice. These foods are very easily digested and will tend to bring your blood sugar levels up very quickly. At first, this produces a "feel good" sensation, but this is very short lived. In response to the sudden flood of sugar into your bloodstream, your insulin will spike as well, thereby cleaning out the excess sugar in your blood and storing it as fat. This results in your blood sugar bottoming out again and making you crave more to eat. When you find yourself "grazing" in front of the
refrigerator door, it's a sign that you've been eating the wrong kinds of foods.
The goal is to stabilize your blood sugar.
A quick rule of thumb is to stay away from foods white in color. Instead, opt for whole grain breads, cheese, meat, and vegetables. A little fat in your diet (i.e. cheese) will tend to slow down the
absorption of carbohydrates into your blood (a good thing). For example, a sandwich made from whole wheat bread, cold cuts, and a slice of cheese is a good choice. However,
that same sandwich made with white bread, and you would soon be hungry again.
Here are some good links to learn about foods that satisfy:
If you need a mood adjustment quick fix, drinking a glass of milk can be very helpful. As you might expect from watching the immediate satisfaction babies get from
nursing, milk is particularly good for producing a calming effect. In addition to milk sugars, milk is also rich in calcium, potassium, and magnesium which are particularly useful in fighting depression (see below). If you happen to be lactose intolerant, a good alternative to milk would be calcium fortified orange juice or soy milk. If you're on the go, opt for an energy drink fortified with B vitamins (also good for lifting moods) over a soda.
For more information, see:
Milk Stirs Debate
Stay away from recreational drugs or alcohol since
they can make your subdrop much worse by effecting your blood sugar and
depleting vitamins your body needs.
2. Nutritional Supplements
Taking extra vitamins during the days after a good scene can help a lot with your subdrop. In addition,
vitamins can help to rebuild tissues damaged by a good scene. If you smoke, take contraceptives, eat a lot of
simple carbohydrates, or drink alcohol, you may need to recharge your nutritional
stores since these activities all tend to deplete B vitamins and minerals.
The B-Complex vitamins are especially important. Your body needs folic acid, B6 and B12 to manufacture neurotransmitters, chemicals that control alertness and mood by speeding nerve signals through the brain. Vitamin C and the minerals magnesium, calcium, zinc, iron, manganese, and potassium all play a role in healing the body and fighting depression and moodiness.
You can read more about this at:
Vitamins and Depression
One of the best multi-vitamins I've found is First Step For Energy. This is a liquid multi-vitamin that is used by
college and professional athletes. Itt's effectiveness is largely due to to the fact that it's a
great liquid vitamin, and therefore is much better absorbed by the body than your typical tablet vitamin. It's also
quite tasty, so there's less resistance to "taking those pills".
You can read details about about 1st Step For Energy at FullPerformance.com (the manufacturer's site). But don't buy it there because you can get it much less
expensively by going to WorldClassNutrition.com (and no, I don't get paid to say that). Here's a nice tip:
when you look at their charges for shipping, you'll notice that they charge the same shipping regardless of whether you buy one bottle or ten.
Consequently, it makes good sense financially to buy as much as you can afford each time you purchase a shipment
in order to minimize your shipping costs. They also give a nice discount if you buy three or more bottles at a time. Each bottle has 16 days worth of vitamins.
If you don't want to buy 1st Step liquid vitamins, you can always use Centrum or One-A-Day multi-vitamin
tablets, but to get the same yield, you'll want to double the dosage when
you're dealing with subdrop. To get the higher B vitamins, you'll need to supplement that with a B-Complex tablet
or sublingual liquid. All of this is available at any drug store, but in the end, you'll actually pay
as much or more for all of this than if you buy the 1st Step. In addition,
tablets won't be as pleasant to take or be as effective since tablet vitamin don't absorb as well as liquid vitamins.
If your depression is particular strong (not just the "blues"), you might also consider adding St. John's Wort to your regimen. This is a well known mild anti-depressant
supplement that you can buy in any drugstore on the vitamin isle. Although
it's not as effective as prescription drugs for treating clinical depression, it
can be effective for mild depression.
3. Be Active and Interact With Others
When you're feeling down, there's a tendency to withdraw from the world and stay in bed. This doesn't help. Instead, get up, get out, and interact with your friends. If nothing else, simply talking with your friends on the phone can do a lot to brighten up your mood. Make a date with friends to go to the park, go shopping, go to an upbeat movie, or go out for lunch.
Journaling is the practice of keeping a diary or journal that explores thoughts and feelings surrounding the events of your life. To be helpful as a stress management and self-exploration tool, you should write in detail about your feelings and impressions related to stressful events as one would discuss topics in therapy.
LiveJournal.com is a good site for setting up an online journal.
Something as simple as getting up out of your home and taking a simple walk can have a very positive effect on your mood. Yoga and tai chi are also great exercises that can help you relax your mind as well as your body. If you're up for it, going to the gym for a good workout will have the added benefit of giving you
endorphins to ease the withdrawal. But you don't have to go to the gym. Buy a set of light barbells from any department store, and spend a few minutes doing bicep curls. As simple as that is, the
endorphins released from the exercise can have a positive effect on your mood.
6. Hobbies and Pets
Working in the yard or doing some gardening can be great for relaxation. Petting your dog or cat is another great stress reliever. Finding something you love to do (like a favorite hobby) and focusing your attention on that activity can be a great way to elevate your mood.
Meditation is a great way to relieve subdrop and to find peace within yourself. It's easy to learn how to do, and it costs nothing but a little time. Here are three different
techniques that you may want to try using. Take a few minutes to check them out. You'd be surprised how easy it really is.
How To Practice Basic Meditation for Stress Management
How To Practice Focused Meditation
How To Reduce Stress Quickly With Karate Breathing Meditation
8. Self Hypnosis
Learning how to put yourself into the super relaxed state of hypnosis is a good way to calm yourself and find peace within.
How To Do Self Hypnosis
9. Listen to Soothing Music
It's true that music soothes the savage beast, even when that beast is subdrop. Soothing music playing in the background can help you relax and make you feel better. Combined with meditation and self hypnosis, it can be particularly helpful. Depending on your tastes, some good choices might be Enya, Engima, Pink Floyd, Dido, Santana, Sarah MacLachlan, Loreena McKennitt, Era, Norah Jones, jazz, and classical music.
10. Aroma Therapy
Certain scents have the power to trigger relaxed comforting responses within ourselves. Scented candles, incense, bath fragrances, and plug in air
fresheners can all be used to create a more soothing environment.
A Final Note
If you find yourself suffering from depression for
more than two weeks, it's time to talk with your doctor since this now has
moved into the realm of clinical depression. This is a very serious
illness that can lead to all kinds of health issues. If your doctor
prescribes drugs to help with your depression, be sure to get a referral for
counseling as well. Anti-depressant drugs should always include
counseling, but often this is overlooked by family doctors.
This article is copyrighted by SirReal